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| 10 Secrets All Men Keep From Their Wives |
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| Written by Shawn Johnson, BDO Staff Writer | |
| Saturday, 27 September 2008 | |
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Secret #1: Yes, we fall in lust 10 times a day -- but it doesn't mean we want to leave you If the oldest question in history is "What's for dinner?" the second oldest is "Were you looking at her?" The answer: Yes -- yes, we were. If you're sure your man doesn't look, it only means he possesses great peripheral vision. It's not that we want to make a move on these girls, it’s just that looking at other women is like a radar that just won't turn off. Secret #2: We actually do play golf to get away from you More than 21 million American men play at least one round of golf a year; of those, an astounding 75 percent regularly shoot worse than 90 strokes a round. In other words, they stink. The point is this: "Going golfing" is not really about golf. It's about you, the house, the kids -- and the absence thereof. Secret #3: We're unnerved by the notion of commitment, even after we've made one to you This is a dicey one, so first things first: We love you to death. We think you're fantastic. Most of the time we're absolutely thrilled that we've made a lifelong vow of fidelity to you in front of our families, our friends and an expensive videographer. But most of us didn't spend our formative years thinking, "Gosh, I just can't wait to settle down with a nice girl so we can grow old together.” Generally it takes us a few years (or decades) to fully perish that thought of bachelorhood. Secret #4: Earning money makes us feel important In more than 7.4 million U.S. marriages, the wife earns more than the husband -- almost double the number in 1981. This of course is a terrific development for women in the workplace and warmly embraced by all American men, right? Right? Yeah, well, that's what we tell you. But we're shallow, competitive egomaniacs. You don't think it gets under our skin if our woman's bringing home more bacon than we are -- and frying it up in a pan? Secret #5: We like it when you mother us, but we're terrified that you'll become your mother With apologies to Sigmund Freud, Gloria Steinem -- and my mother-in-law. Secret #6: Every year we love you more Sure, we look like adults. We own a few suits. We can probably order wine without giggling. But although we resemble our father when he was our age, we still feel like that 4-year-old clutching his pant leg. With that much room left on our emotional-growth charts, we sense we've only begun to admire you in the ways we will when we're 40, 50 and -- God forbid -- 60. We can't explain this to you, because it would probably come out sounding like we don't love you now. Secret #7: We don't really understand what you're talking about You know how, during the day, you sometimes think about certain deep, complex "issues" in your relationship? Then when you get home, you want to "discuss" these issues? And during these "discussions," your man sits there nodding and saying things like "Sure, I understand," "That makes perfect sense" and "I'll do better next time?" Well, we don't understand. It doesn't make any sense to us at all. And although we'd like to do better next time, we could only do so if, in fact, we had an idea of what you're talking about. We do care. Just be aware that the part of our brain that processes this stuff is where we store sports trivia. Secret #8: We are terrified when you drive
Want to know how to reduce your big, tough guy to a quivering mass of fear? Ask him for the car keys. Secret #9: We'll always wish we were 25 again Granted, when I was 25 I was working 16-hour days and eating shrimp-flavored Ramen noodles six times a week. But as much as we love being with you now, we will always look back fondly on the malnourished freedom of our misguided youth. While it doesn't mean we're leaving you to join the NBA, it does explain why we occasionally come home from Pep Boys with a leather steering-wheel cover and an old school CD. Secret #10: Give us an inch and we'll give you a lifetime I was on a trip to Mexico, standing on a beach, waxing my surfboard and admiring the glistening 10-foot waves, when I decided to marry the woman who is now my wife. Sure, this was three years before I got around to popping the question. But that was when I knew. Why? Because she'd let me go on vacation alone. Hell, she made me go. This is the most important thing a man never told you: If you let us be dumb guys, if you embrace our stupid poker night, if you encourage us to go out -- by ourselves -- our silly little hearts, with their manly warts and all, will embrace you forever for it. And that's the truth.
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(BlackDoctor.org) -- In the interest of uniting the sexes, researchers have scoured the country for guys willing to share the private truths they wouldn't normally confess. Some are a bit crass. Some you've always suspected. Some are surprisingly sweet. (Guys don't like to reveal the mushy stuff, either.) But read on, and you may discover that the truth about men isn't all that ugly.
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I am well aware that there are more things to consider when making the "forever" commitment. I firmly believe that it would make it easier on a woman to stay in that relationship with all the bumps along the way if she knows completely what to expect going in.
Some things about a man and what he does during the course of a marriage is extremely hard to accept. However, if we hang in there through his stuff while he returns the favor, in most cases I think it will be alright.
Keep writing, loved it.